Psychological abuse is elusive. Unlike physical abuse, the people doing it and receiving it may not even know it’s happening. It can be more harmful than physical abuse because it undermines what we think about ourselves. It can cripple us as we allow something untrue to define us. Psychological abuse can happen between parent and child, husband and wife, among relatives and between friends. The abuser projects their words, attitudes or actions onto an unsuspecting victim. Usually this occurs because they themselves have not dealt with childhood wounds that are now causing them to harm others.
In the following areas, ask these questions to see if you are abusing or being abused:
Humiliation, degradation, discounting, negating. judging, criticizing:
- Does anyone make fun of you or put you down in front of others?
- Do they tease you, use sarcasm as a way to put you down or degrade you?
- When you complain do they say that “it was just a joke” and that you are too sensitive?
- Do they tell you that your opinion or feelings are “wrong?”
- Does anyone regularly ridicule, dismiss, disregard your opinions, thoughts, suggestions, and feeling.
- 2. Domination, control, and shame:
- Do you feel that the person treats you like a child?
- They constantly correct or chastise you because your behavior is “inappropriate?”
- You feel you must “get permission” before going somewhere or before making even small decisions?
- Controlling your spending?
- Treating you as though you are inferior to them?
- Do they make you feel as though they are always right?
- They remind you of your shortcomings?
- They belittle your accomplishments, your aspirations, your plans or even who you are?
- Give disapproving, dismissive, contemptuous, or condescending looks, comments, and behavior? CONTINUE READING